How I Learned to Manage ADHD Stress and Transform My Life

Struggling with ADHD stress? Discover how I transformed overwhelm into clarity by tackling decision-making and adopting simple, life-changing strategies. Sleep better, stress less, and take control—starting today.

Stress was the catalyst that finally pushed me to seek an ADHD diagnosis several years ago. At the time, I was so overwhelmed that I couldn’t sleep without relying on sleeping pills. The lack of rest only fueled my anxiety, turning bedtime into a nightly battle. After 15 years of living in this exhausting cycle, I was a complete mess.

What finally pushed me to seek help was a combination of fear and desperation. I was terrified of dropping dead from a stress-induced heart attack by 40, and the increasingly frequent, dark thoughts of suicide were a wake-up call I couldn’t ignore. I knew I needed answers, and that’s when I reached out to Dr. Christina Zampitella.

Sitting down with her to review the results of my 5-hour ADHD assessment was a turning point. She explained my results in a way that no one else had—a way that made me feel understood and validated. For the first time, I didn’t see myself as a failure or a lost cause. Instead, I felt a sense of peace and permission.

Permission to accept that what I was experiencing was real. Permission to stop fighting against my ADHD and start working with it. The first step? Tackling my stress.

The Question That Changed Everything

I started by asking myself one simple but life-changing question:
"What stresses me out?"

The answers surprised me. While lack of sleep and dehydration amplified my stress, the biggest culprit was decision-making. Every decision, no matter how small, felt like a monumental task.

To manage this, I developed a strategy I call "Stressed? Stop and Sort." Here’s how it works:

1. When I feel stress creeping in, I pause and take a deep breath.
2. I trace the stress back to its source by retracing my thoughts.
3. I identify the specific decision or thought that triggered the stress.

This simple practice has been a game-changer. I’ve become so adept at it that I can usually pinpoint the source of my stress within seconds.

Becoming a Better Decision-Maker

This realization inspired me to become a better decision-maker. I learned that decision-making is an executive function tied to the frontal lobe—an area often impaired in the ADHD brain. Armed with this knowledge, I committed to being patient with myself and finding strategies to simplify the process.

Here are a few of the strategies that have transformed my life:

1. Think in Threes

When faced with a decision, I limit my options to three choices. This prevents overwhelm and helps me focus on what truly matters.

2. The 5 W’s

I ask myself: Who, what, when, where, and why? This helps me clarify the decision and break it down into manageable steps.

3. Forward Think, Backwards Plan

I visualize the outcome I want, then work backward to create a plan. This keeps me focused and reduces decision paralysis.

4. If/Then

I prepare for potential outcomes by creating "if/then" scenarios. For example, "If I feel overwhelmed, then I’ll take a 10-minute break."

5. At Least

I focus on the minimum viable action to reduce overwhelm. For example, "At least I’ll choose one thing to accomplish today."

The Results

Practicing these strategies daily has rewired my brain. I now make decisions quickly and confidently—something I never thought possible. Surprisingly, I’ve even become a planner. While people assume planning comes naturally to me as a Professional Organizer, it doesn’t. Planning is another executive function that ADHD makes challenging. But I’ve improved, and that’s what matters.

The best part? My stress levels have dropped, I sleep better, and life feels easier. I’m happier, healthier, and more in control.

Your Turn

If you’re struggling with ADHD-related stress, I encourage you to try these strategies. Start by asking yourself, "What stresses me out?" and go from there. Remember, progress—not perfection—is the goal.

For more tips like "Stressed? Stop and Sort" and "If/Then," check out my new book, "If Clutter Could Talk...The Stories It Would Tell," available now on Amazon.